What are the unwritten rules...

DOBEEDO · **What are the unwritten rules... -** 08-02-2006, 04:18 PM

I played a tournament a few weeks ago. Mixed doubles, each match you play with a new girl. The unwritten rule here was the guys do not serve girls. So I accept that and play respectably. For the most part everyone abide by this.

This Sat. I played in a reverse coed 2's with a friend who is a very capable player.

The event director said that guys serving girls is fine. OK, so he said it, big deal, I still will not serve a girl. It is an unwritten rule. So our first match comes up and the guy serves my partner every single time during the whole match. Being our first match, we lose, OK fine . We go throughout the day with guys sporadically serving her. The thing is, that this is womens height so my partner can put the ball down and were eating teams alive that are trying this. We go through pool play 8-2. The two loses came with the first match of the day.

Out of the pool play and now in the tourney it comes about our first match is against the team that beat us. So being about 4pm and seeing how this guy keeps serving my partner, I decide to jump serve his partner. Ace after ace comes about and we move on and they go home.

I did not appreciate what he did. There has to be some ethics in this game but, if someone is going to do it to us I will return it one hundred fold. I don't want too and I didn't in the first match but whats was I supposed to do?

I think that the guy was wrong in serving her every single time. If we were warm we would have demolished them like we did in the second match. What do you think?

strazzere · 08-02-2006, 06:11 PM

Well.... It's a double edged sword... Yes there are ethics... But like you said - they were specificly told you can server at the girl. Does that make it right? No - but it makes it allowed.

I personally won't crush a ball at a woman, unless I know them, or they call me out on it. I think I'd personally find it offensive if someone never served to me, or hit at me etc since i was [insert gender here]. Now - if they are new thats a different matter.

If it's a competative tournament, with normal rules - game on. Your sopost to find the weak spot. I'd hope in any semi-friendly tournament someone doesn't serve a person 5+ times in a row (if they are all aces).

You have morals, the other guy might not have. I will serve a weaker player if I must - but normally won't. This can change if we're in collegiate tournament play though...

I wasn't there, you have a better view than me. Maybe the guy sucked at serving and couldn't serve any where else?

I'd also like to point out the irony in your avatar.... "No girls allowed".

P.S. - Welcome to the site

cheetah · **"Gentlemans rule" -** 08-02-2006, 09:06 PM

Hi Dobeedo,
What you are referring to is what we call the "Gentlemans rule" down here in Phila. When we play pick up, and my husband and I are playing another coed team, we generally abide by it....the guy serves the guy and the girl can serve whoever she wants.
What we found when we did our first tournament eariler this summer though is that at the B/BB level in coeds they don't play this rule consistently....but at the A level they do. In our pool in B/BB some teams abided by this rule, and some did not....but generally all the A level teams followed the gentlemans rule. I guess it is an unspoke courtesy. I think another consideration is the level of play....in the B/BB some teams can't aim their serves, but you can generally tell who can and can't aim. My husband felt the same way you did....he would generally follow the rule, but if there was a team that went after me continuously on serve receive, he would fire right back at the girl with his serves.
Oh, and by the way, welcom to the site

NewEnglandRT · 08-02-2006, 09:22 PM

I guess the gentleman's rule makes sence. But like DoBDO my partner (if it's coed it's usually wifey) is a much better passer, and a better hitter in the sand than I am.... at any height. So shame on them. I'm usually of the opinion of if you're on the court, then I'm going to serve it to you.

Like my other post says.... serve tough all the time, everytime. M/F don't matter, you're not getting an easy one from me.

Unless it's a tournament I try to move the ball around though. Just makes things more fun.

Thinking more about it.... this really seems to be more a rule benefiting the men unfairly. If you don't follow this rule then the dudes aren't going to be hitting much theoretially. If I was a chica, I'd not like this rule.

mycena · 08-03-2006, 09:14 AM

Yeah I am gonna get all womens lib on you all. When I first read it I didn't even think that it was mean to serve to the woman. Rather it is unfair not too. Sounds to me like it's a way for the guys to get to hit all the time, relagating the woman to a setter. Do you have to hit at the men all the time too? It doesn't make sense to me. As far as defense goes I don't think that men have any advantage over a woman. So why not serve to the woman? Hitting is a different story (in some cases). Personally, If I were playing in a Coed tournament on a womans net and no one served to me, I would get really pissed off. I want to hit! But that being said. I never try to serve to one person consistantly. I mix it up. I want to play, not serve aces all day, and I hate people who only serve to one person. It's lame! ok done ranting.

tbarbera · 08-03-2006, 09:36 AM

If you are playing a tournament you should have two goals, to win and to get better. When you play to win you should take into account your oppenents weaknesses. If a person has a terrible set, I will serve thier partner so they have to set it every time. If a player chem every can't hit, I will serve them every time. If a player can't pass I will serve them every time. The other thing that is beneficial is to pick a player to pick on in the first 5 points of the game. This is usually the weaker player. Pass, hit, serve, roll to them. Make them move and tire out every chance you get. If you make them pass it, they almost always have to hit it. If they are hitting every play of them game, they will get tired. The other partner who is only setting will also get fustrated becasue he/she isn't hitting. To me it is a win-win situation. Show no mercy, play by the rules, the writen rules, meaning nets, blocks and on and on.

To sum it up, serve whoever, it is a tournament.

-Tyler

DOBEEDO · 08-03-2006, 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by strazzere

Well.... It's a double edged sword... Yes there are ethics... But like you said - they were specifically told you can server at the girl. Does that make it right? No - but it makes it allowed.

I personally won't crush a ball at a woman, unless I know them, or they call me out on it. I think I'd personally find it offensive if someone never served to me, or hit at me etc since i was [insert gender here]. Now - if they are new thats a different matter.

If it's a competitive tournament, with normal rules - game on. Your supposed to find the weak spot. I'd hope in any semi-friendly tournament someone doesn't serve a person 5+ times in a row (if they are all aces).

You have morals, the other guy might not have. I will serve a weaker player if I must - but normally won't. This can change if we're in collegiate tournament play though...

I wasn't there, you have a better view than me. Maybe the guy sucked at serving and couldn't serve any where else?

I'd also like to point out the irony in your avatar.... "No girls allowed".

P.S. - Welcome to the site

The guy could serve, I think he was just playing his own game and being a jerk. I noticed that many of the other teams when he served their female were annoyed. His jump serves were strong and visually directed. I have to say, I'm going to ask each team if they would not mind serving me only or not slamming my partner, pun not untented, but funny.

Thank you for the welcome, this site is great, I met a someone in a Vegas tournament who told me about VBLI and I just got around to joining.

The avatar was a joke, I was hoping someone would get it.... but it's funny none the less.

Thanks
DB

DOBEEDO · 08-03-2006, 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheetah

Hi Dobeedo,
What you are referring to is what we call the "Gentlemans rule" down here in Phila. When we play pick up, and my husband and I are playing another coed team, we generally abide by it....the guy serves the guy and the girl can serve whoever she wants.
What we found when we did our first tournament earlier this summer though is that at the B/BB level in coeds they don't play this rule consistently....but at the A level they do. In our pool in B/BB some teams abide by this rule, and some did not....but generally all the A level teams followed the gentleman's rule. I guess it is an unspoke courtesy. I think another consideration is the level of play....in the B/BB some teams can't aim their serves, but you can generally tell who can and can't aim. My husband felt the same way you did....he would generally follow the rule, but if there was a team that went after me continuously on serve receive, he would fire right back at the girl with his serves.
Oh, and by the way, welcome to the site

Yeah seems the "gentlemen rule" evades so, I think at the level we were playing it was just a deliberate act. People are a lot smarter then they look.... I like that I'm not totally wrong here.....

thank you for the welcome..

DOBEEDO · 08-03-2006, 10:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewEnglandRT

I guess the gentleman's rule makes sence. But like DoBDO my partner (if it's coed it's usually wifey) is a much better passer, and a better hitter in the sand than I am.... at any height. So shame on them. I'm usually of the opinion of if you're on the court, then I'm going to serve it to you.

Like my other post says.... serve tough all the time, everytime. M/F don't matter, you're not getting an easy one from me.

Unless it's a tournament I try to move the ball around though. Just makes things more fun.

Thinking more about it.... this really seems to be more a rule benefiting the men unfairly. If you don't follow this rule then the dudes aren't going to be hitting much theoretially. If I was a chica, I'd not like this rule.

I agree only in part, in higher division games, men can actually hurt a 125pds tight AA/OPEN female, if on a womens hight net actually injure. There are few women on this planet I know that can serve like 180pd open men . The point I'm making is don't win points on serves alone, serve the ball in and play, don't look at taking out the weaker player, I think its evil, co-ed 2's is fun not win at all costs!

However, indoor sixes, beach two's, hell - GO FOR IT!

Co-ed twos on a women's height net I have a problem.

DOBEEDO · 08-03-2006, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mycena

Yeah I am gonna get all womens lib on you all. When I first read it I didn't even think that it was mean to serve to the woman. Rather it is unfair not too. Sounds to me like it's a way for the guys to get to hit all the time, relegating the woman to a setter. Do you have to hit at the men all the time too? It doesn't make sense to me. As far as defense goes I don't think that men have any advantage over a woman. So why not serve to the woman? Hitting is a different story (in some cases). Personally, If I were playing in a Coed tournament on a womans net and no one served to me, I would get really pissed off. I want to hit! But that being said. I never try to serve to one person consistently. I mix it up. I want to play, not serve aces all day, and I hate people who only serve to one person. It's lame! OK done ranting.

The women should not be just the setter, mix it up is what I'm saying, don't save your "power serves" for the female only. shake it all up..... I like setting in fact I'm good at it, so my partner totally love playing on any team I'm on, however, the "win at all costs" stinks.

WOMEN POWERS UNITE!